Sunday, February 08, 2004

i dont even really know what to say about this weekend... i dont know where to begin...

i am so frustrated at the lack of male influence over my youth group. i am so frustrated. when i go to places like calvin crest and see other youth groups with awesome young male leaders, my heart breaks for my kids. im jealous of that and i dont understand why my kids cant have that. why wont God put someone here in woodlake who loves and cares for these kids like i do? there is only so much i can do as a girl, and i do it the best i can with all of my heart. these kids are my life right now. fall in love with these kids, share this little ministry, be a blessing and be blessed more than you could ever imagine.

im jealouse and i often myself feeling incredibly alone in this ministry. there are some churches with youth groups who have 2 or 3 young guy leaders. i just dont understand.

its hard to be a vegetarian at camp. especially when you dont eat meat AND you cant have milk products. i managed though. im fine.

im not really fine, actually.

i failed to drop my class by the drop date so now i owe the school money for the class im not even taking.

at least i didnt sleep through the counselar meeting again. i was there sort of...

God bless people with a heart for jr. highers, becuase this weekend i found out that i dont have one. i do love them, or i try rather, but i dont think i could work with them constantly like i do with the high schoolers. and i think that my lack of enthusiasm makes them not like me too much.

in the midst of the drama of this weekend ( did i mention the TWO 16 oz cups of coffee that spilled in my car? ), there were a couple of things that warmed my heart starting with good times on the drive up, a little wave and smile from across the room, witnessing two complete oposite girls being the best of friends, hearing a good story about true God based love from a girl whom i dont know very well, talking with an old friend, having a awesome time with somebody who i thought i could possibly never have an awesome time with again, a hug, a detour around bass lake on the drive home and a valentine from sammy. thank you all.





also, once again i felt the need to simplify my life. so i simplified my web page. one day it will be artistic again... but, question... is the text too hard to read?

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